Its 1020 pm on a Saturday night and I am at home doing my homework.
[There are a billion things wrong with that statement]
1. I'm at home on a Saturday night.
2. I am doing my homework
3. I have no where to go after my homework is finished.
:-(
Isn't that an awful realization?
If you're wondering why I don't call my friends, I did- I called four of them, oddly enough none of them picked up to phone. They don't know each other, so each one of them has to do something separately exciting today.
This sucks because this means that, again, my friends have other things to do tonight (work, curfew, boyfriend, friends, drinking, etc) I would really like to go dancing tonight.
:-(
As I have risen from freshman to why-am-I-still-here I have realized that the parties and invites for outings have ceased. Some of it is due to friends moving, working and others is due to the fact that I don't drink as hard/often as I used to. Friends who drink prefer not to hang out with those who don't, for various reasons. Either because they don't believe that I will have a good time with drunk people when I am sober (which is a lie). Or that the concept of someone who doesn't drink is odd.
Not spending my weekday/weekend drinking is a good thing in my life. I'm not vomiting my nights away and making a complete ass of myself on weeknights while having my friends tell me about what I've done the next morning. What I can't- and don't like to handle- is the fact that people treat me like a leper because I don't drink. It very much sucks.
My roommates act like a couple, they treat me as some person they just live with: not a friend that they have known for half a decade. Friends my age have already graduated and are starting to figure out what they want to do with their lives while working full-time. Other friends live with their parents and have to deal with the whole "they live under their roofs, they do as they say" stuff.
I'm not complaining, I'm just extremely lonely.
I would meet new people, but the only people around me are younger and they annoy the hell out of me. Other people my age, who don't drink, are too busy with grown up jobs and lives to make new friends. In order for me to make new friends, I would have to have time to sacrifice to coordinate schedules and normally, they don't match.
It's all very confusing, but everything is the same. On a Saturday night, I have no where to go and no one to talk to.
Maybe I should take up reading.
I'm not complaining, I'm venting and worried.
[There are a billion things wrong with that statement]
1. I'm at home on a Saturday night.
2. I am doing my homework
3. I have no where to go after my homework is finished.
:-(
Isn't that an awful realization?
If you're wondering why I don't call my friends, I did- I called four of them, oddly enough none of them picked up to phone. They don't know each other, so each one of them has to do something separately exciting today.
This sucks because this means that, again, my friends have other things to do tonight (work, curfew, boyfriend, friends, drinking, etc) I would really like to go dancing tonight.
:-(
As I have risen from freshman to why-am-I-still-here I have realized that the parties and invites for outings have ceased. Some of it is due to friends moving, working and others is due to the fact that I don't drink as hard/often as I used to. Friends who drink prefer not to hang out with those who don't, for various reasons. Either because they don't believe that I will have a good time with drunk people when I am sober (which is a lie). Or that the concept of someone who doesn't drink is odd.
Not spending my weekday/weekend drinking is a good thing in my life. I'm not vomiting my nights away and making a complete ass of myself on weeknights while having my friends tell me about what I've done the next morning. What I can't- and don't like to handle- is the fact that people treat me like a leper because I don't drink. It very much sucks.
My roommates act like a couple, they treat me as some person they just live with: not a friend that they have known for half a decade. Friends my age have already graduated and are starting to figure out what they want to do with their lives while working full-time. Other friends live with their parents and have to deal with the whole "they live under their roofs, they do as they say" stuff.
I'm not complaining, I'm just extremely lonely.
I would meet new people, but the only people around me are younger and they annoy the hell out of me. Other people my age, who don't drink, are too busy with grown up jobs and lives to make new friends. In order for me to make new friends, I would have to have time to sacrifice to coordinate schedules and normally, they don't match.
It's all very confusing, but everything is the same. On a Saturday night, I have no where to go and no one to talk to.
Maybe I should take up reading.
I'm not complaining, I'm venting and worried.
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